


Well, Dad Isn't Here Anymore.

by miss_little_kitten



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Age Regression/De-Aging, Bed-Wetting, Diapers, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, Non-Sexual Age Play, Number Five | The Boy Has Issues, Number Five | The Boy Needs A Hug, Other, Past Child Abuse, Why Did I Write This?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-09
Updated: 2020-05-17
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:02:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23554252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/miss_little_kitten/pseuds/miss_little_kitten
Summary: After the apocalypse that almost happened, things slowly go a bit crazy. Klaus has an unconditional need to comfort and somehow Vanya does too. Just read it? I suck at summaries.
Comments: 8
Kudos: 144





	1. Klaus

**Author's Note:**

> Here we go I guess.

Klaus wasn’t sure when it started, this overly protective crap that seemed so stupid. Maybe it was the day Five came back, but it was hard to tell. He didn’t want to admit it, he never did in reality. But Five was just so little, so small, so fragile. He knew Five felt differently from pretty much constantly, but maybe it was the constant reminder of the torture his father was putting him through at 13 that made Klaus want to fix Five. Fix wasn’t the right word either, but maybe show him he didn’t need to be strong? Maybe he wanted to show him he was truly abused as a child and he can make it better now. It couldn’t be that first day though, he wasn’t sober for Five. He got Sober for Five. He would never admit it, a huge part of it was to be able to see Dave, but someone had to raise Five. Well, half raise Five. He could fear the small patter of Five’s feet yet, he was laying on his bed listening to the small genius work. Noise in absolute silence was something Klaus had been very good at picking up since he was a small child. Hearing his feet was almost a constant reminder that the child had absolutely no concept of time and the fact people needed to sleep to survive.   
“He should go to bed.” Ben stated to Klaus, suddenly sitting on by his feet.   
“You think I don’t already know that?”  
“I’m just saying, you should tell him.”   
“I’m sure that will go over swimmingly.”   
“He might listen to you.”   
“Easy for your to say when you’re already dead.”   
“You never know. Come on Klaus, for me? Your only dead brother.”   
“You sure pull that dead card a lot you know.” Klaus, sighed before getting ready for whatever response was about to come his way.  
“Five, it’s one am.” Klaus yelled out to him, he could audibly hear a sigh.   
“Then go to sleep.” Was called back to him, sass more than evident. It was Klaus’ turn to sigh loudly now.  
“Come on Five, it’s one am, what could you possibly be working on?”   
“Nothing you need to know about. You’d have to actually be smart to understand.”   
“Come on, go to bed. It’s late.”  
“I’ll go to bed when I’m ready!” Was shouted louder back.   
“You both need to shut the fuck up before I shut you up.” Diego yelled at them, he supposed they were yelling at one in the morning, waking the rest of the family probably wouldn’t be ideal. Klaus sighed, and got out of bed, grabbing his dressing robe. It was always so damn cold in the academy. He walked over to Five’s room before opening the door, he didn’t need to knock he knew he wasn’t doing anything private.   
“I did not invite you in here.” Five immediately stated to Klaus, barely turning his head over his shoulder. Why Five had to write on the damn walls was beyond Klaus. Dad would have physically beat them if he walked in on Five writing on the walls.   
“It’s one am, I don’t need invited. It’s time for sleep.”   
“I can sleep later Klaus.” He didn’t know why, but Klaus walked over to Five and grab his hand gently. Five looked at him like he was the actual Devil, cursing him with his eyes. His size allowed Klaus to keep his grip on him though, deciding that it would be worth being killed if he laid down.   
“Why don’t you lay down for a while at least, then you can get back up and keep writing with he chalk.”   
“I am older than you, stop this. I am not tired, I know when I need to sleep. I am not a child.” He could hear some venom in the tone from Five, but Klaus was almost at a lost. He wanted to chastise him, tell him it was bed time, but Five was technically older.   
“I know, but come on. I know when I was 13 my body played a ton of tricks on me. I bet if you lay down, you might feel tired. Maybe, if I’m wrong you can keep working.”   
“I don’t want to lay down yet, I want to go home.” Klaus sighed, this had been a common theme for about two weeks since they adverted the apocalypse.   
“I get you want to go home, but if you’re tired at all your calculations could be wrong you would never know! It’s time to just lay down for a bit.”   
“Why don’t you go to sleep?”   
“Oh burn, he burned you Klaus.” Ben appeared and laughed lightly.   
“Ben, shut up. Maybe you should go to bed. Back to you Five. Come on, you can work on getting home tomorrow.”   
“Technically it is tomorrow.” Five said to Klaus.   
“It’s tomorrow now.” Ben mimicked a comedy special they recently watched.   
“Come on Five, please. I’ll lay down with you for a while if you want?” Klaus had tried this trick twice before, and each time he was met with silence before an agreement. Klaus wasn’t sure why this worked, Vanya had gotten it work a few times so Klaus began using it.   
“I’ll lie down for ten minutes only.” Five finally caved sitting his chalk willingly down looking at Klaus angered, but less angry than he saw two minutes ago.   
“Sounds good, come on, let’s lay down.” Klaus moved to turn the lights off, flipping a small penguin night light on that no one spoke about. Klaus watched Five get comfortable before half laying down, sitting up slightly so he could look down at Five.   
“Ten minutes, just ten.”   
“Yes Five, I know, just ten minutes.” He looked down as Five leaned closer to him, Five ended with his head on his chest. Five would never admit it out loud, but Klaus had the calmest heart rate next to Vanya, so laying on his chest made it a little better.   
“Can I ask something?”   
“You can ask anything Five.” Klaus’ hands began to mindless run his fingers through Five’s hair, a small hum in contentment came from Five.   
“You guys became closer before you fell apart right?” Five had this new thing, he asked constantly about what their childhood was like after he left.   
“Kind of, Vanya actually let Ben and I’s room get bigger. After Ben we all sort of fell apart.”   
“Where did Vanya go?”   
“Another room. She said she didn’t mind at the time, but we really didn’t need a bigger room.”   
“Can you tell me about childhood?” Klaus’ heart ached at this question, he got it a lot from Five, he always tried to make it seem less bad, less abusive.   
“When we turned 16 Dad refused to let us get our permits, but Grace snuck us out one Saturday so we all could get them. Terrible choice really, I can’t drive worth shit yet.”   
“I’m not surprised you were probably wasted when you learned.”   
“I had to keep them quiet somehow.”   
“Was Ben always there?” Five’s voice became quieter as sleep started to take over the small 13 year old.   
“Ben always has stayed no matter the drugs.”   
“I love you Ben.”   
“I love him too.” Ben said from the corner, reading a novel he had found.   
“He loves you too.”   
“I missed you guys.” Small hands scrunched at Klaus’ robe, looking for more comfort. Klaus switched from petting his hair to rubbing his back in a rhythmic fashion.   
“We missed you everyday. I promise we all missed you, I know we have said it one hundred times, but we really did. We waited everyday, we just weren’t expecting you to be like this. In a way it’s nostalgic, think of all the times Vanya left out food, it was like you never left. So small and all.”   
“I missed you everyday too. Not small.” It was barely awake as the words were said. Klaus smiled down, Five once again fell asleep in the same position he had found himself in multiple times now. He knew to wait to get up, he knew not to stop rubbing his back, he knew now because maybe Five wasn’t an adult right now and he didn’t need to be. 

He remembers throwing a basic fire extinguisher into the portal Five opened, he isn’t even sure why his high self thought that was a good idea. But in reality, was there a better idea? He disagreed. Luther willing to put himself out front in front of his messed up family? He was willing to let space boy die, or was he because Luther was annoying in life, let alone if he was stuck with him forever. They didn’t want to run though, almost as if they knew something big was going to happen.   
He saw Five immediately, and from there he feared the worse… he saw Ben every single day, but why was he just seeing Five now. Child Five at that, he should have seen him long ago if he died.   
“Does anyone else see little Number Five, or is that just me?” He knew his words were laced with slight fear, but his voice rocking a bit was the least of his worries.   
“Shit.” Was all he heard from Number Five before the family acknowledged him. Relief flooded over him, his brother was thankfully alive, but confusion followed. He was 13, he was a baby, he was so small. He thinks of the day, over and over, debates if he could have changed anything growing up, he hears soft puffs of air coming from the lips of the assassin, his signal he could finally slip out of the bed. Looking at the clock as he used his ninja like skills not to move him at all, thank you the unholy numbers of walks of shame he had to do over the years…


	2. Vanya Figures Something Out

Sweet moments like laying in bed with Five became more frequent, for both Klaus and Vanya, but Vanya especially saw an increase in weird behavior for her brother. He would sit by her as soon as he would notice her presence in the house, she started spending more nights there. Roughly three months have passed by since the whole powers thing came to light, but it seemed like an eternity ago. So, shouldn’t he also be more normal? Or as normal as Five could be she guessed, maybe it was just the fact he was what? 58 years old and the size of her. She guessed she’d be upset too.   
She opened the front door of the academy, she had her phone in hand and she had big news, she had a tinder date. She was excited, but also nervous to announce it, she debating not telling anyone. When she realized she had agreed to get dinner on the night she said Five and her could watch some movies. If she seemed super excited, she hoped Five wouldn’t mind that they would have to miss a single movie from their night.   
“I have big news!” She called out, as if she were Klaus announcing literally anything.   
“What?” She heard Allison say as she walked in the living room. It seemed a little tense, and Five was sitting on his feet almost pouting already, he was alone in an armchair.   
“Did I interrupt something?” She wasn’t sure what she had walked in on.   
“We were just… having a talk.” Allison said looking at Five as Vanya sat on the empty couch across from Allison, Luther, and Diego. Klaus was laying on the other part of the sectional.   
“Oh, what about?”   
“Nothing.” Five answered for the first time, his voice angered.   
“It was something, Five can’t break things during an argument.” Allison said. Vanya pinched the bridge of her nose, sighing loudly. When she opened her eyes, she saw that Five’s face fell more by her action.   
“What happened?”   
“I had a coffee cup smashed on me today.” Luther said glaring.   
“Because you wouldn’t shut your fucking mouth. You have no god damn concept of quiet. It’s morning, you should be silent. No one wants to hear you anyway.” Vanya looked a bit stunned, she knows she did.   
“Five,” she started, looking at him, his eyes we’re tired as he had bags for days, “I have to agree with them, but have you not slept yet?” Allison face palmed at Vanya’s words.   
“Five why didn’t you tell me you didn’t sleep? Why aren’t you sleeping, love?”  
“Don’t call me love. I slept fine last night Vanya.” Klaus snorted at that, laughing some.   
“Don’t even try, I don’t sleep like at all, I heard you all night until I went to sleep at three am. And you were up before me.”   
“Five, you need to sleep.” Vanya said to him, she didn’t want to sound harsh. Five rose quickly from the chair he was in, clapping his hands together once in the process.   
“And you know what Vanya? You aren’t my fucking mom. None of you are. Incase anyone hasn’t noticed we never had parents so how about instead of all of you being my parents, you all stop the shit. I am older than all of you. All of you! Stop treating me like a child, stop acting like I am a child. Fucking Luther grabbed my arm today when I went to punch him, he wouldn’t grab anyone else and tell them to take a deep breath. He’d hit them back. Now if everyone doesn’t mind I am leaving, get off your fucking high horses.” And with that a light of blue flashed and Five was gone.   
“Fucking prick.” Diego muttered and Luther agreed silently. Allison had her nose pinched and eyes closed, Klaus probably looked like Vanya, a bit stunned.   
“What was your good news Vanya?” Allison asked then after a moment, figuring she could clear the air. “Oh, um, I got a date.” She said sheepishly, she knew she should follow Five.   
“No, no we can’t do this again.” Klaus laughed slightly, playfully smiling towards Vanya.   
“Oh I pick one guy who turned me into a monster and suddenly I’m bad at picking dates.” She was laughing a bit towards her brother.   
“Well, I mean, you did kill him… so is it best to kill a second date?” Diego laughed.   
“Maybe I’m into that.” She laughed, her personality had really begun to shine since she stopped the medications, she still had slight ones though. As a way to deal with the fact she had crippling depression and anxiety, plus it was a way for her to stay more in control.   
“Oh, do tell more?” Klaus said laughing more.   
“Jesus, why are you all like this?” Luther said.   
“Listen just because you can only hook up with girls who think you’re a furry doesn’t mean everyone is like that.” Klaus retorted.   
“One time, one freaking time.”   
“Only time.” Klaus corrected.   
“I hate every ounce of your being.”   
“That’s not a lot of ounces.” Diego said in direction of Klaus’s small stature.   
“Anyway! What’s he like?” Allison asked.   
“Well, she’s into nerdy stuff too I guess. I feel like a nerd a lot so that’s nice. She plays the flute, which is super cool. She also dances, like ballet dancing.”   
“Ooooo, a she. I like her.” Klaus said laughing.   
“Did you meet her in the orchestra?” Allison asked.   
“No, if I admit how we met, no one is allowed to make fun of me after fifteen minutes, okay?”   
“Holy shit you met on a dating app.” Klaus said immediately. Vanya’s flustered face was answer enough for the siblings to begin laughing with her.   
“Yeah, on Tinder.”   
“Vanya, Ben would like to ask: why are you telling us this date when it is clearly a hook up?”   
“Oh shut up Ben.” Vanya laughed.   
“So when is the date?” Luther finally asked.   
“Tonight actually.”   
“You’re going in that?” Klaus asked.   
“Thanks Klaus, I’ll remember that statement, and no, I am going to change.”   
“Weren’t you suppose to do something with Five tonight?” Diego asked.   
“Yeah, I have to tell him we need to push off an hour or two, I actually should go do that.”   
“What time tonight?” Allison asked.   
“Six, I asked for an earlier dinner because of Five actually.”   
“That’s going to go over great.”   
“He said it himself, he’s a grownup, he’ll handle it fine.” Luther rolled his eyes, as did Diego, their grown up did not handle things like an adult.   
“I’ll go do this now then…” Vanya sighed slightly, starting her way to the stairs. How upset could Five really be? The stairs seemed longer, Vanya was anxious about all of this. She knocked lightly on Five’s door.   
“What?” He responded harshly.   
“Can I come in?” Vanya asked, softly.   
“No, you’re just going to lecture me as if you somehow became my god damn mother.”   
“Actually, I am not. Please let me come in?” A very loud, audible sigh came from the door.   
“Fine, whatever.” Vanya slowly opened his door, he was pacing in a circle that had long missed his small feet. She slowly went to the desk chair and sat down, she looked down at equations being written.   
“Hey Five, what were you working on?”  
“Stuff.” She sighed at his childish answer.   
“What kind of stuff?”  
“Stuff to go home.”   
“Oh, I thought we were home.” Vanya smiled slightly.   
“I mean back to when we were 13, to prevent this.” He moved his arms around to emphasize what he meant.   
“Why? I mean, we were clearly abused children, why not just let it be here?”   
“Vanya, I can stop it or at least help us.” He had this small sounding voice to her right now.   
“Five, it can wait. How about we lay down for a bit?” Vanya was hoping maybe he would nap, even though it was eleven am.   
“Vanya, I said you could come in if you acted like my sister, not my fucking mom.” Venom filled his voice.   
“I’d asked Klaus to come lay, come on.” She stood and gently pulled him by the hand to lay down in bed. He seemed annoyed, but complied. He was never a snuggly child, but she knew he needed physical contact to calm down from whatever this is. They laid in silence for a while, his breathing still fast.   
“Vanya, if I asked something, could you promise me to keep it one hundred percent secret?”  
“I promise.”   
“I can’t stop thinking, I’m literally shaking somewhat even now. I don’t know what is wrong with me.”   
“How long has it been going on?”   
“I haven’t slept in two days.”   
“Five, why didn’t you tell anyone? Or me? Yesterday. We can do something for this.”   
“What can be done?”   
“I don’t know maybe anxiety meds? Literally anything, do you want me to get mom? I’m sure we have some, I know I even have some.”   
“No, I don’t want drugs. I just want to lay here.” Five wouldn’t look at Vanya, feeling like a child. He was just barely touching her, but it was enough to ground him better.   
“Is that why you hit Luther? Just super tired?” She asked him, beginning to feather his hair.   
“I don’t wanna talk about Luther, or that.”   
“If you’re just grumpy I’m sure he’d understand.”   
“Oh my god, don’t use the word grumpy to describe me.”   
“Why? Grumpy old man, grumpy is used to describe old men.”   
“I literally hate that.” He sounded amused, moving slightly to lay on her chest some.   
“I’ll make a note, do you want to sleep?”   
“No, I wanna do more math.”   
“Well, maybe we should nap.”   
“Naps aren’t my thing.”   
“They’re mine.” She whispered, wrapping her arms around her brother, they were roughly the same size, he may be slightly smaller, but he was as close as possible. His breaths slowly evened out, and he grabbed at her shirt, desperate for more comfort, not that he would admit that ever.   
“I’ll wake you when I get up.” She said to him, as they slowly drifted asleep. 

When Vanya opened her eyes she felt dampness, that quickly turned to complete wetness. Her eyes looked around confused to her location for moments, before adjusting her eyes. It was about two in the afternoon, she was in Five’s room, and she could definitely smell urine.   
“Oh baby…” she whispered feathering Five’s hair as his eyes we’re flickering violently beneath his eyelids. She felt so bad that she even muttered the words baby, but he’s so small. She assumed a nightmare, but she suddenly remembered from them being kids. Five was a bed wetter when they were younger, their father never handled that well. It angered him, because it was both Five and Klaus who were chronically bedwetting… maybe this is part of Five’s problem. He was thirteen again… she wasn’t sure how to handle this. She didn’t need him freaking out, but frankly she was laying in her brother’s urine and she was becoming cold and itchy, she couldn’t imagine what he was feeling. Their father would yell and humiliate the children, but clearly Vanya wasn’t him. She rubbed his back.   
“Hey Five, hey five it’s time to wake up.” Vanya began waking him up.   
“No, sleep.” Five’s whine came sleepily. Vanya didn’t mean to coo silently, but she did. He was so small, so innocent, so peaceful somehow. She was about to ruin that.   
“Five, buddy, come on, we gotta get cleaned up.” Five’s eyes fluttered a bit as he gripped her shirt a bit harder, as if the fabric was the only thing there to comfort him. He came into consciousness and looked around the room, fear filling his eyes.   
“No, no, no, no, no, no.” He started repeating, he grasped Vanya’s shirt before switching to grab his hair instead.   
“Hey, no, don’t pull hair. We don’t pull hair, come on let me have your hands.” Vanya whispered, trying to soothe him. The royal we would definitely come back to bite her.   
“Dad’s going to kill me.” Five whispered in disbelief before addressing Vanya, “V, you gotta go change. Dad is going to kill me, if he finds you dry he won’t do the same to you.” A stray tear fell quickly. He hadn’t registered they were adults yet, he hadn’t registered how Vanya was comforting him in a small light voice, trying to make everything better somehow for him.   
“Hey, Five, no, Dad’s not going to kill us. Hey let’s take a deep breath and ground ourselves.” She tries deep breathing. Then it really hit Five as to what happened, he realized exactly what happened.   
“I am so sorry. I am sorry. Vanya please don’t hate me.” Five continued to ramble as he finally released his grip on Vanya and pushed his back towards his wall, a grimace on his face as he shifted.   
“Five, why are you freaking out? It’s okay we just have to shower…” she knew why this freak out was occurring, if she had wet the bed she’d probably freak out too.   
“I shouldn’t have laid down, how could I be so stupid.” Five muttered, as Vanya sat up to dry some of his tears.   
“You needed to nap Five, come on, let’s calm down. Do I seem mad?” Not one ounce of anger was present in her voice, he sobbed and suddenly buried himself into her. She shushed him and rocked back and forth slowly, this was not cleaning up, but she understood the need for a good cry. She was concerned about a rash forming though.   
“Our secret?” Five asked desperately and suddenly.   
“Five, I think we should tell mom, what if you have a UTI or something? Only mom though, promise?”  
“No, Vanya, no.” he whined and drew out his no’s.   
“Just mom. She needs to make sure you’re okay. Come on, let’s clean up first. We can talk when we’re clean. There’s two bathrooms on this floor, we can both take one.” She watched fear fill Five’s small eyes.   
“No.” It was shouted lightly, before composure was slightly regained, “no… can you just stay with me. We can take turns, please don’t leave me.”   
“I mean sure, come on, let’s get up.” She watched Five bite his nails, he didn’t move, he watched her instead with such intensity it felt as if he could see through her. She instead moved first, holding her hand out for him to take, which he readily did. The two walked in silence after she looked for other siblings. She closed the bathroom door behind them, Five still held on to her hand. Five finally said something as she began messing with the tub nobs, he was mumbling though.   
“What was that Five?” She asked gently.   
“Can I have a bath instead?” His head was still hiding in his hands, but the words came out. Vanya turned around a bit, to read his body language. He seemed so scared.   
“Of course Five, let me run a bath. I bet Klaus has bubble bath if you want that?” He nodded at her inquiry, she found it quickly to begin the bath. As she turned around she smiled again, he wouldn’t make eye contact. “Come on there Five, let’s get undressed.” She was shocked he hadn’t yelled at her for using the royal we yet, she was also shocked by his behavior in general though. He hadn’t moved a muscle. She sighed slightly, she walked towards the smaller figure to help him undress. She tugged on his shirt and he raised his arms for her, silently. She pulled his pants down, leaving his boxers for him. His skin was already red and irritated, she was shocked but he always had super sensitive skin.   
“I think the tub is almost ready, it’s nice and warm for you.” Vanya said to him as Five walked over to the tub behind her, he quickly stripped his boxers as Vanya turned her head for his privacy.   
“I’m sorry.” Five whispered as he sat in the tub, it was an odd sight, he was surrounded by bubbles and his knees were under his chin, he looked so sad.   
“There’s nothing to be sorry for. Besides for this, how was the nap?” She sat on the toilet seat next to the tub, he still avoided her eyes.   
“Good, I slept really good. Clearly too hard.” He laughed a bit for the first time since it happened, she smiled at him.   
“It happens Five. Is the bath warm?”   
“Yeah, I missed bathes.” He said quietly, “Dad didn’t let us take them after Grace stopped bathing us.” Vanya sighed, sad he didn’t get to experience late night bathes as her and Allison would sneak.   
“You can always take a bath.”   
“I can hear his voice, when I go to do anything.”   
“I’m sorry Five, I did too for a long time and still do sometimes.”  
“He clearly was right though, I still am just a dumb baby who can’t keep his fucking pants dry.” He wiped stray tears from his eyes.   
“Five… don’t say that about yourself.”   
“Well, clearly it’s true.”   
“We don’t know if it’s a UTI yet or anything… it could be medical. Either way it probably is medical, you know trauma can cause nightmares.”   
“Considering I did this when I was little, I doubt anything is actually wrong with me. Just with me as a person.”   
“Nothing is wrong with who you are, even if this happens sometimes.” Vanya watched as Five stared down at the bubbles.   
“Everything is wrong with me.” Vanya knelt on the ground in front of Five.   
“Nothing is wrong with you, I love you, and everything is going to be okay.” Five longed to believe her, looking up hopeful at her. “Do you want me to wash your hair?” She asked and Five nodded quickly. She grabbed the cup Klaus kept by the tub and she rolled up her sleeves before beginning the process. It was peaceful silence now, the physical contact was relieving to Five. He wouldn’t admit it, but the song Vanya hummed as she massaged his scalp was hypnotic, or maybe that was just the action being done. She covered his eyes as she rinsed out the shampoo, after finding the condition she began that.   
“Smells pretty.” Five whispered, happy about the touch he was receiving.   
“It does, it’s Ali’s. Smells like roses. I’m going to leave it in okay? I am also going to run to grab you some new clothes for you super quick. I’ll be right back, I swear. But you need some new clothes. Is that okay?” He whined unconsciously to Vanya, not wanting her to leave.   
“Can’t I stay in a towel?”   
“No, it’s chilly. I’ll be real quick, promise. Wash your body while I’m gone.” She got up quickly rushing out the door so she couldn’t hear his whine for her to stay. As she closed the bathroom door again, she went for Five’s room, but was stopped.   
“What are you doing?” Klaus asked Vanya, as he finished a bowl of ice cream, emerging from his bedroom looking a tad out of sorts.   
“Not much grabbing some clothes.”   
“Why are you all wet?”   
“That’s why I’m getting clothes.”   
“You smell like… are you okay?” Klaus caught on as Vanya walked into Five’s room.   
“I’m fine yeah, not too sure about Five.” She sighed as she dug through his top dresser looking for pajamas and underwear.   
“Ahhh, did he wet the bed again?” Vanya looked around quickly, looking at Klaus in confusion.   
“How did you know that?”   
“I watch him clean the bedsheets in the middle of the night, plus very distinct smell. It’s one you can’t forget.” “You didn’t think to tell anyone?” She pinched her nose in frustration.   
“Hey, first time he did it I had a nightmare about Dad, so not my business. I want to help, but he’s scared and the old man doesn’t let anyone help.” She sighed.   
“I guess. We need to get him clothes, I feel bad brining him the academy pajamas.”   
“Good luck with that one.” Klaus laughed.   
“I’m stealing a pair, I don’t have a change of clothes.”   
“Ah, get caught in the cross fire?”   
“Let’s not make jokes about this.”   
“Why? He literally would torture each and everyone of us if he had the chance.”   
“It’s the concept Klaus… how long has this been going on?”  
“After the whole Vanya destroys the world thing, he didn’t really sleep before that.”   
“Thanks for that Klaus.” She closed the dresser with two sets of pajamas and two pairs of boxers, she would have to return these later.   
“Don’t mention it. Just remember you’re the size of a 13 year old.” He called out as she walked back into the bathroom. Five still looked content, sitting in the warm water, she would be fooled if he wasn’t an actual adult.   
“Hey Five, you done?” She asked gently laying down two sets of clothes.   
“Can I just set here a couple more minutes… please?” He asked, looking up with those glassy eyes.   
“Of course.” She sat on the rug in front of the tub, so they were eye level.   
“Klaus told you didn’t he?” Five asked, already knowing what happened they aren’t that quiet when they speak.   
“Yeah… he did. Why didn’t you tell anyone? We can fix this.”   
“You can’t fix it.”   
“We can try… come on Five. I’m your sister what would I ever do in malice towards you.”   
“It’s ‘barassing.” He slurred slightly and Vanya just had sad eyes as she push the wet hair out of his eyes.   
“You need a hair cut there bud, getting a bit shaggy. And that’s nothing to be embarrassed about.”   
“Vee, I don’t wanna talk about this.”   
“Okay okay, I surrender.”   
“I’ll get out now.” Five said, not raising his eyes to hers, but she got up anyway grabbing his towel. She sat it down while turning around to give Five his privacy. She her the water slosh as he stepped out and wrapped a towel around himself.   
“Am I good to turn around?” Vanya asked.   
“Yeah…” she turned around and went to unplug the tub so she could jump into the shower next. Somehow she knew this wouldn’t be the end of this topic.


	3. Let's Just Try Something

“You have a date tonight don’t you?” Allison asked as her and Five were eating a super late lunch in their matching pajamas.   
“Oh shit, I totally forgot. Yeah I do. Shit I need to go get clothes.”   
“What don’t want to wear satin pjs on your date?” Klaus laughed. Five had stayed tense since he woke up. Vanya had cleaned up his bed and scrubbed the mattress, littered with stains, with bleach as best she could. He watched her do it, shame filling him.   
“No, I don’t know what I’m wearing yet.”   
“A dress.” Klaus asked, wiggling his eye brows.   
“Yeah right, I’m thinking jeans and a cute top.” Five looked around a bit bewildered, either he didn’t know she had a date or she never told him. He leaned in closer to her instinctively, she took note, as did everyone else in the room.   
“What time is it?” He whispered to her.   
“At six, so in about an hour I’ll leave.” She whispered back.   
“Oh, okay.” He seemed sad, something Klaus noticed quickly, frowning.   
“We’ll have fun here, I swear.” Klaus says, smiling to try to get him to be so sad.   
“Can I do your makeup? Please?” Allison begged slightly as Vanya shrugged, squeezing Five’s hand before she walked away. 

She stood in front of an isle she never thought she’d be in: the night time training section for children. Her date went okay ish, she decided she wasn’t really into the girl, but would probably give her a second chance. Her mind was pretty preoccupied tonight. She was staring at the training pants, Five was not over 100 pounds, but he was so little looking. She grabbed a package and read the sides, it showed a not too babyish design, very simple blue stars. He wouldn’t hate those right? She may live to see another day? Probably not either way, she grabbed them with some diaper rash cream, his red irritated legs seemed painful. As she walked to the front she stared at different things, sappy cups and pacifiers. She was angry thinking of their father, she never was attached to anything really. Taking a soother from Klaus was Hell though, Dad only let Klaus have it into his double digits because it prevented him from crying all night after he would lock him in the crypt. Only on days they personally trained. Five refused to let go of a blankie, his soother also was a slight struggle. She had noticed in Luther’s room his bear from childhood migrated back into his room, on a shelf after Dad died. Diego’s blanket laid by his pillow. She sighed contently walking up to the check out counter, grabbing two frozen Starbucks drinks that were pre made and a couple types of candy for her and Five to binge tonight. She finally finished the short to the academy, preparing to be murdered. She stepped in slowly, keeping the one bag behind her back.   
“Vanya!” Five immediately appeared in front of her with a flash of blue, she jumped back.   
“I will never get use to that.” She laughed slightly.   
“You’re home.” He hugged her and she awkwardly hugged back, trying to make sure the box didn’t hit him. He sounded almost relieved.   
“Yeah, have you been drinking?” She could smell it a little bit.   
“Only a little.” Diego laughed, clearly intoxicated as was Luther and Allison. Somehow Klaus became the adult in the few short hours she was gone.   
“I got you a coffee if you want Five, but you don’t need it. I’m going to the kitchen real quick first, Klaus would you like to join?” Klaus looked annoyed until he made eye contact.  
“Can I come?” Five asked, hurt.   
“No, I wanna talk to Klaus buddy. I’ll be right back. Swear.” She kissed his cheek and he hummed with content. He still felt betrayed, but it would be forgiven, for now.   
“What is up Vanya?” Klaus asked laughing at her tense posture.   
“I got something for Five, but I wanted to warn you incase I get murdered tonight.”   
“He won’t murder you, what’d you get him?”   
“Pull-ups…”   
“Yeah you’re going to die, Ben agrees with me.”   
“Thank you everyone for your wise words of wisdom.” She said slightly annoyed.   
“Hey he’s drunk he might not have the fine motor skills to kill you tonight, it could be in the morning.” Vanya sighed at Klaus’ response.   
“You said this has been happening a while, no?”   
“It has been, doesn’t mean he’s ready to deal.”   
“How long did it take for you to grow out of it?”   
“I was like sixteen maybe seventeen.”   
“We can’t let him wake up most nights wet until he’s seventeen.”   
“I mean I did it.”   
“Klaus you were a drug addict, I love you, but I don’t think you’re the good comparison study. Plus, Dad wouldn’t let us do anything even if we tried too.”   
“While hurtful, I see your point. Yeah I’d definitely have this conversation while drunk with him. He gets all lovey and cuddly, especially towards you.”   
“What did anyone even let him drink today?”   
“Honestly he chose that for himself.”   
“Okay, well I am going to go deal with this.” She had a sigh escape her lips as she walked back into the common living space they were drinking in.   
“Vee! You’re back.” Five giggled as he swayed back and forth.   
“Hey do you wanna come watch a movie with me up stairs, Five? I have snacks.” She said smiling, in hope he would join her.   
“Yeah movie.” Five smiled wide as they walked towards the steps and into Five’s room. She closed the door, she waited a few moments for him to crawl into his now made bed.   
“Did Mom make your bed?” She asked him, smiling. He nodded grabbing a soft blue blanket Vanya didn’t remember from this morning.   
“Mom found my blanket.” He blushed a little bit.   
“Did she check you out?”   
“No, I didn’t tell her.” He whined slightly, high pitched and child like.   
“We can tomorrow.” Vanya said, Five shook his head. She would ignore that.   
“What movie are we watching?”   
“Whatever you want to watch.” Five scrolled mindlessly through Netflix, choses some children’s movie Vanya remembered from when she first left the academy. About half way through Vanya watched little eyes droop more and more, alcohol definitely making his tiredness more known.   
“Hey Five, can we talk?”   
“Course. ‘Bout what?” Vanya took a deep breath, now or never was her thought process.   
“How are your legs?”   
“Itchy and sore. I said I didn’t wanna talk about this.”   
“Well we are, I’m sorry we have too. We’re both adults, so we are talking like adults.” He pouted at her words.   
“I promise I’ll see mom in the morning.”   
“Good, but what if I told you, you could sleep all night?”   
“I already do.” She sighed, not what she meant.   
“I meant all night, without being wet.” He looked at his feet, suddenly interested in his small feet, covered in socks Vanya bought him.   
“Klaus said you’ve been doing this a while, I should have figured it out.”   
“No I haven’t.”   
“Don’t lie.” Vanya said, pushing his soft hair back, trying to be comforting.   
“Dad use to say this was punishment for being bad, I must be bad. I just need to fix it. I promise I’ll stop being mean…”“No, Five. No. This isn’t punishment, you aren’t mean, you aren’t bad. You’re my Five. I don’t know what Dad use to do or say, but forget all that and listen to me. I can help this problem, and we don’t have to tell anyone. It’s like a secret.” Five was still drunk, trying to comprehend what she was saying.   
“I won’t wake up wet?”   
“No, do you trust me?”   
“Maybe.” Five seemed leery of her words.   
“Can I at least help your rash? It looks painful.”   
“How do I stay dry? I know tonight I won’t, I’m a little tipsy, but I stop drinking at five usually.” That made Vanya worried, he had to be struggling hard.   
“You try these new type of underwear, and we put this cream on the rash.” She pulled out the pack of pull-ups and hoped she wouldn’t die.   
“I don’t want diapers.”   
“Not diapers! They’re just protection…” her defense sucked, she had time to think about this, but she must admit she was hoping he wouldn’t question at all.   
“Dad said diapers are for babies.”   
“Well good thing Dad is dead and these aren’t diapers.” She wanted to ask what their father would say, but a huge part had no desire to know what he did to scar Five. Five looked down at the knowledge Vanya said.   
“It stays a secret?”   
“100%, but we have to tell Mom in the morning.”   
“One night, if you promise to stay.” Vanya nodded at the acknowledgment. She handed Five the packages, his face flushed.   
“I’ll close my eyes and turn around, pinkie swear.” She said as she turned her back. She heard the package opening, and Five attempting to get everything just right.   
“Can you make sure the rash cream is everywhere?” His whispered, he was clad only in his pajama top and pull-up when she turned around, she couldn’t coo and she knew that.   
“Yeah, come here.” She grabbed some more cream and rubbed it into some more of his thigh he had clearly missed. As she finished, she patted the small of Five’s back. He was very silent, she was concerned he hated her.   
“Thank you…” his voice was quiet as he pulled up his pajama pants. The satin sticking a bit.   
“Let’s go wash our hands.” She said standing up, not appreciating the feel of cream on her hands. Five followed her, she could hear slight rustling behind her. He was like her shadow suddenly, he tugged on her sleeve as they left the bathroom, she turned and he hugged her. Like a real hug.   
“You okay there Five?” A slight laugh left her mouth.  
“Yeah, just missed you.” She didn’t point out they had spent at least an hour together, instead she turned off the lights and just let the TV illuminate the room. Five and her laid there, just as they did when they were younger. Her fingers tracing through his hair.   
“I love you, no matter what.” She pressed a kiss to his forehead, ignoring the words she was expecting to get, instead she got a faint “you too.” Back to her. She caught that as a sign she could fall asleep.


	4. I suck at titles.

“Five! Why must we do this every single day! How can you not learn? How can you remain so useless?” He could hear his father scream at him. He fucked up again.   
“Dad, I…”   
“I, I, I? That fucking stutter you get when you realize how useless you truly are. You are twelve years old, you had so much potential, but here we are! You piss yourself like a god damn toddler.”   
“Dad I don’t mean too.” He was breathless, his dad just never would listen.   
“Do you just want the attention? Because here it is! You fucking pathetic child.” He could feel hot tears run down his face as his father belittled him. He just wanted to be normal.   
“I want to stop, dad. I do.”   
“Do you? Do you really?” His voice bellowed as Five could feel himself become smaller.   
“I do.” He cried out, trying to convince his father.   
“Five!”   
“I’ll do better!” 

“Five!”  
“Don’t hit me.”   
“Five!” He jolted awake, looking around, to see the darkness of his room swimming around him. He could feel someone there. He was panting, but his eyes finally adjusted, Vanya had been the one waking him up.   
“Vanya!” He flooded with relief as he clung to her suddenly, as if he would time travel if he didn’t hold on.   
“Hey Five, hey, let’s calm down.” She ran her hand through the sweaty mess of his hair, it was stuck to his face.   
“I’m sorry.” He seemed sullen, still clinging to her, but embarrassed more than anything.   
“Don’t be sorry. We all have nightmares.”   
“They don’t wake up their siblings from screaming though.”   
“Hey, when I went to college and started therapy, I use to wake up a whole dorm hall with my screams…”   
“What do you dream about?”  
“That room… I didn’t know that then though.” Vanya admitted.   
“What time is it?” Five asked as it was a few minutes later, calming down the more time had passed.   
“About six am, want to go get a coffee?” Vanya offered, hoping he would agree. Or maybe they could go back to sleep, either way.   
“Yeah, let’s go get coffee.” He whispered, shifting, finally realizing what had also occurred. Vanya had already known, she didn’t dare say a word about it though. He had a panicked look in his eyes, as he met hers. She took a deep breath, knowing that she had to state something in order for this to work. “Wanna get cleaned up first? Then we can go get coffee? Maybe watch some TV? Are you still tired?” He shifted uncomfortably.   
“No one else is up?” His voice once again seemed smaller than a man in his fifties.   
“No, so no one will know.” He looked hesitant.   
“We can watch a movie?”   
“We can do anything.”   
“What if I fall back asleep?” There was the nervous apprehension she was sensing.   
“Well, you can always put another one on, they aren’t any thicker than your boxers really…” Vanya hoped her head wouldn’t be cut off at the suggestion. Five actually looked like he considered it for a moment.   
“I’ll just drink more coffee… it’ll be fine. Meet you downstairs Vee?” He said to her as he got up. She nodded and smiled slightly, watching him make his way to the bathroom as she slipped out of bed as well. She was met with Klaus in the kitchen.   
“Shit, man, you scared me.” She laughed lightly, going to start the pot of coffee.   
“Quiet like the dead, always have been.” She snorted at his response.   
“You’re on the of the most obnoxious people I know, but sure.”   
“I see you lived through the night, how’d the old man take it?”   
“He’s changing now.” She said as she went to the fridge to grab the creamer she kept for herself.   
“You both didn’t need a bath though.” He laughed.   
“No, we didn’t. Hey I have to duck out here in a little bit, have to go to practice. He wants to watch TV.” She mindless was speaking, Klaus was observing her movements. She made coffee in a slow sort of way, calming.   
“Are you making breakfast?” He asked, watching her look into the fridge.   
“I was going to just have yogurt, but I can cut up some fruit. Do you want some?” Klaus nodded as he continued to watch her begin the process of cutting up fruit.   
“Did he tell you about Dad yet?” Klaus finally said, the question had been on his tongue.   
“I was able to pick up on a little, but I don’t want to just ask him. It seems rude.”   
“He was Hell. Actual Hell. I’m happy you didn’t know.” Vanya sighed and stopped cutting her apple to look up at him.   
“I knew Klaus, I knew when we were little. I guess I did not know know, but I had an idea. I am so sorry I didn’t ever say anything.”  
“Vee, you couldn’t take care of yourself, let alone try to defend me. Just thanks for not writing about it.” He tried to make the room light as she kept cutting.   
“I regret that book.” She sighed, moving onto strawberries.   
“Why?” He knew she did, but was curious.   
“It made you all hate me even more.” Vanya said as Five entered the room, shocked to see Klaus.   
“But I got to know you all.” Five said looking down, taking his seat at the table.   
“Never thought of it that way.” Vanya said, pouring Five a cup of coffee before sitting it in front of him.   
“I will take a cup of that, please dear sister.” Klaus said smiling towards Vanya. She complied and continued breakfast.   
“What are we eating?” Five asked, unsure of a lot, his unease able to be felt.   
“I’m just cutting up some fruit and figured we could have it with yogurt.” Five huffed, he didn’t need his fruit cut up, he wasn’t a child. He just felt off today, not really wanting to talk. He felt slightly betrayed by his body, he literally wet his pull up. He was a fucking child and he couldn’t fucking stand it. Now here were his siblings talking quietly as one cut up his fucking breakfast. He wanted to jump away, but another part of him longed to be here. He longed to see the banter between siblings. Vanya slipped his plate in front of him. He looked up and muttered a thank you.   
“I’m so happy you did kiwi.” Klaus said, joining him and Vanya. Vanya sat further away than Five would have liked, which made him upset. Both at himself and the situation. He stared as Klaus held Vanya’s attention, he wanted to know what was hiding in her mind. Did she actually think he was gross? Did she want to laugh at him? Did she tell Klaus? Would she make fun of him with his other siblings? Five felt his confidence continue to fall as they all ate. Breakfast soon was finishing up for them.   
“You got some yogurt, here.” Vanya leaned across the table to wipe the corner of his mouth, which was shaped into a scowl.   
“I’m not a child.” He huffed, in a very child like way, but he just couldn’t help it.   
“She’d clean my face too old man.” Klaus joked as he put his dishes in the sink.   
“He’s not wrong. What do you want to watch this morning?” Vanya asked as she poured her and five both a second cup of coffee before the trio began their trek to the living room. Five followed, wanting to grab a hand for an unknown reason, he just held the cup tighter.   
“Just a movie.” He muttered, following, sitting on the couch next to Vanya. Head resting against her somewhat cold shoulder. 

“Okay, I’m going to head home and shower before I have practice.” Vanya said, grabbing her backpack she carried between the academy and her apartment.   
“You’ll be back right?” Five asked, following her to the door.   
“I’ll be back, but it’ll be a while.” She reassured, unsure as to why she had to reassure her brother who consistently stated was an adult.   
“Okay… how long?” They were now at the door.   
“Probably after lunch.”   
“Can I see mom after lunch then with you?” ah, bingo, there it was. He was scared of being treated medically.   
“Yeah, or Klaus can go with you. It’s just mom.” She said to him, his hand was touching her sleeve loosely.   
“Promise you’ll come back?” God he hated how he sounded right now. She hugged him tightly.   
“Promise.” She whispered in their embrace, an answer he was willing to handle. As they let go she smiled, “I love you. Have fun.” She walked out the door rapidly as Five stood in the entry way, feeling mixed.   
On one hand he was an adult, he didn’t need to hold someones hand, he didn’t need anyone. On the other hand, he wanted to cling to her and beg her not to go to practice. The fear of losing her was definitely taking over. When did he become such a child? His thoughts were pulled away from him when Klaus suddenly spoke.   
“Okay hear me out, we go get doughnuts. I know Vanya fed us healthy, but doughnuts.” He was simply ridiculous, but Five realized it was in that moment, what he needed. Klaus to be, well, Klaus. Five nodded, not giving any verbalized answer. 

“Five?” Vanya closed the door behind her as she called out his name.   
“Diego, get your ass back here.” Was yelled by Luther as she entered their home, Diego was running off with something she presumed was Luthers.   
“Don’t commit murder before dinner!” Allison yelled as Vanya walked into the living room. Klaus was laying on the couch laughing with Allison.   
“Is Five home?” She asked her siblings, Allison nodded.   
“He’s upstairs brooding away for who knows what reason.”   
“He’s probably just laying there. He can only stand us for so long.” Klaus responded, amusement in his voice.   
“Go find your little duckling.” Allison said as Vanya flipped her off before slightly jogging up the steps. She knocked twice on Five’s door. It was roughly 3pm, longer than she had planned to be gone. No response came, she sighed and pushed open the door a little. She found Five’s face smushed into his pillow, completely asleep. She smiled and cooed slightly, she was aware he was an assassin and all that, but now she just felt protective over the small body in front of her. She also knew he had been asleep for some time, he was definitely in urine soaked bed again, the smell was very noticeable the closer she got. She squatted to get eye level with Five as she pushed his hair out of his sweaty face.   
“Hey Five, it’s time to wake up.” She said calmly, she kept pushing his hair back, humming, in an attempt to gently wake him. His eyes stayed closed, and she felt guilty. Her brother was about to be upset again, which made her worry even more. At least he agreed to see their mother. She said his name again, and his eyes slowly fluttered open as he became aware of his surroundings.   
“Need a little cat nap?” She asked, rubbing his back sitting on the edge of his bed.   
“I didn’t know I’d fall asleep.” He groaned, tears prickling his eyes.   
“Hey, hey, it’s okay.” She comforted.   
“I hate myself.” He muttered, looking up sadly at Vanya.   
“Hey now, none of that. You go shower, I’ll clean up and then we can see mom.” He sat up looking at her in a sullen state. She hugged him around his shoulders, smoothing out his hair lightly.   
“I can’t stand this.” Was all he said as he stood up, a deep blush evident as she smiled softly, he huffed before taking off to the bathroom to bathe. She wished she could just magically fix all of this for him.


	6. I can't believe you like dad shirts, Vanya

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy this steroid written chapter. Anaphylaxis sucks and so do the meds.

“Five how long have you been experiencing symptoms?” Mom asked in her gentle tone, Five sat clad only in boxers on the medical table, Vanya sat in a chair on her phone.   
“Um…. A while I guess?”   
“No fever.” She said to him, she went about looking for her urine sample cup.   
“It just happens mom.”   
“I know dear, Klaus wet the bed regularly up into his later teens.” She said as if it was nothing, grabbing a cup.   
“I thought it would stop.”   
“You should have came sooner, let’s see if it’s a UTI.” She handed him the cup, holding his hands for a second before robotically moving to look at Vanya as Five slinked off into the bathroom.   
“Could this really just be a thing that happens?” Vanya asked. “Do you think it could be from all the trauma?”   
“Well, it certainly can just be happening, but he has no control either way.” She answered. “Did I do the right thing?”   
“He should have began wearing protection much sooner. I am very concerned about the rash. The cream you got relieves the pain temporarily, but I will give him medicated cream. You’ll ensure he uses it, right?” Mom always sounded so chipper to Vanya, like it was alright even if it wasn’t.   
“Of course Mom.” She said smiling up at her. Five came back and handed Mom the cup.   
“I’ll run this and get results back rather quickly Five. I also did some scans. I’ll bring the results to you when they’re ready. I’ll go freshen up your room Five. Why don’t you and Vanya go out? It might be good for you.” She planted a soft kiss on his head, which he leaned into the comfort Vanya noted, before they both were shooed off.   
“Do you want to do go somewhere? Or do something?” Vanya asked as they descended the steps together.   
“You don’t need to hangout with me just because mom told you too.”   
“Hey we hang out all the time, so Mom just gave me the idea to leave the house.”   
“I don’t know, maybe the library? Or the store? What do normal people do?”   
“I’ll ask one when I meet one.” She tried to lighten the mood.   
“Do you need anything?”   
“Well, I need some new clothes, but you would hate that.” Vanya muttered.   
“We can do that, how bad could that be?” Five asked as they approached the door. 

“How bad could that be?” Five mocked himself as he followed Vanya around the mall, she hadn’t found anything she liked yet and they had been to four different stores.   
“What was that, Five?” She asked him, knowing full well she was driving him insane as she was driving herself insane.   
“Oh nothing.” He muttered, looking around at the stores around him.   
“Want to grab a snack? I need a snack, come on.” They got pretzels and they sat on a bench together. He wasn’t sure if he looked like her son or her little brother, but either way he disliked how people looked at him. He leaned his head on her shoulder as he snacked on pretzel bites. He was staring at a store, the logo identical to the one he saw Allison wear on a pretty regular basis, and even Klaus.   
“Why don’t we go in there? Allison and Klaus wears their clothes.” Five posed the question to Vanya who met his gaze and laughed.   
“That’s because they’re comfortable with their bodies.” Vanya snorted lightly.   
“You aren’t?”   
“No, not really.” She whispered.   
“Why?” Five was generally curious, Vanya always seemed just comfy, anxious yes, but comfy.   
“Just never have been, Dad didn’t help that much.” She reached into her bag and pulled out some pills, taking one.   
“What are those?”   
“Xanax, to help with my anxiety. Honestly why I haven’t tried anything on yet. I am shocked you can’t feel the anxiety radiating off me.” She joked lightly. Five couldn’t feel the anxiety, maybe because he was anxious as well or just so out of touch to human emotions.   
“I’m sorry.” He said confused.   
“Don’t be sorry, you aren’t causing it. So, Klaus likes those clothes too?” She knew the answer, but he was willing to converse.   
“Yeah, he wears their shirts and stuff all the time. Why is that weird?”   
“That’s a Victoria Secret store, or well Pink as well, they’re connected. They sell mainly like bras and stuff. Honestly, super soft material for all their lounge wear though. One of my first purchases at college was a hoodie from them.” She sounded amused almost.   
“Why don’t you wear it anymore?”   
“Honestly, it took four girls hyping me up for me to enter the store, I’m not exactly someone who likes sparkles and such. But very soft clothes.” She noted.   
“I understand, I like understated.”   
“You wear a schoolboy uniform, but I am not sure if that is just to piss off Allison or not.” She laughed to Five, amused by how flustered he looked.   
“It’s comfortable.”   
“No, I get it. I hide in my clothes too.” Vanya stood, holding her hand out for her brother which he took.   
“I don’t hide.”   
“Sure you don’t. Come on let’s go to a couple stores I know I’ll find something in.” The pair entered a store which wasn’t what Five expected, there were skateboards on the walls.   
“You skate?”   
“Oh, oh god no. I love their clothes though.” She walked up to the different shirts on display, button ups with just enough color. She grabbed on in each design in her size before walking towards the shoes.   
“You don’t need to try them on?”   
“No, I know my size in this store. It never changes, plus these are mens so they fit just right.”   
“You wear mens clothing?”   
“A lot of the time yeah, never got comfortable in my own body remember?” She knocked on his head a few times as a “duh” move. He smiled at the interaction and looked at the shoes with her.   
“You’d like those.” He whispered to her about a pair of shoes with a yellow decal.  
“Yeah I do, good eye. Any you like?” Vanya would love to get him a pair of shoes that weren’t those god awful academy shoes. His eyes lingered over a light blue pair before he grabbed them.   
“What size am I?” He asked her as an associate approached them.   
“Can I help you?” They asked in a chipper voice, Five slid behind Vanya more.   
“Yeah actually that would be great. Can I get this yellow pair in a five and I need this blue pair in a seven.” The associate smiled and took their shoes to get pairs from the back.   
“How did you know my shoe size?”   
“I looked before we left incase you liked anything.” Vanya admitted. “You could use a closet update my dude.” She sounded ridiculous, which maybe made it easier for Five to relax a little. They took the shoes from the associate when they came back and Vanya handed them to Five. “Let’s get you socks to go with these. They come in cool patterns that don’t go up to your knee.”   
“I like my socks.”   
“One pack, come on.” Vanya dragged him to the sock section, which he picked out socks with just the logo of the store on them, but in different colors. Vanya on the other hand had grabbed obnoxious colored socks, which made Five laugh some. The two went to check out and Five was suddenly super subconscious. He didn’t exactly have a job.   
“Vee, this is expensive.”   
“It’s fine. Dad has us covered.” She laughed a little as she swiped her card, it made him calm down a bit, he took the bag and nodded as Vanya made small talk. Maybe shopping didn’t suck so much. 

They returned home, with more bags than Allison ever thought she’d see from the two of them.   
“You’re telling me the one time I miss a shopping trip you actually shop?” The question was clearly posed at Vanya.   
“I got some stuff yeah, so did Five. We had fun. It didn’t suck so bad now did it?” Vanya poked fun at Five who groaned loudly, but had a small smile on his face while he did.   
“I like the shoes.” He muttered.   
“You got him to buy shoes!” Allison sounded very frustrated, but still laughing.   
“Yeah, turns out Vans are where it’s at. Which I have only been saying forever.” Vanya said as she carried the bags towards the wash room as Allison grilled Five some. She ran right into Klaus.   
“I swear only two siblings live here.” She laughed as he followed her.   
“Diego and Luther fought about the moon so, they’re both hiding.”   
“He doesn’t need to talk about the moon all the time.” She muttered.   
“He begs to differ. What did you get all?” Klaus asked.   
“Some new stuff, Five got some stuff actually too.”   
“No way in Hell, is Hell frozen over? Ben, quick, is Hell frozen over?” Klaus looked to the spot next to him and laughed.   
“He needed new clothes, I’m happy he agreed.” She muttered ripping tags off as she threw them in the washing machine.   
“A lot of, as the kids say, dad shirts.” Klaus laughed, jumping on the dryer.  
“Have to display my sexuality somehow.” Vanya joked.   
“Ooooo who got the new jammies?” Klaus grabbed at them.   
“Five actually, also I would be on the lookout for your hoodies from Victoria’s Secret, Five asked what the store was today because he knows you wear them. Same with Allison.”   
“I’ll tell you what the fabric is heaven.”   
“I don’t disagree, just saying you might have thief now.” She joked.   
“Did you get Mr. Serious Assassin to go into Victoria secret?”  
“Oh Hell no, I wouldn’t go in, but he commented on the brand and fabric.”   
“Vanya!” Her name was called out just as she started the washer. Klaus and her made eye contact before leaving the laundry room.   
“What’s up?” Vanya asked as she saw Allison standing alone where Five had been not ten minutes prior with her.   
“He ran off, but I think you should check on him. He seemed… distressed.” Allison said to her.   
“Distressed how?”   
“Vee, I don’t know. Because Mom mode kicked in and I want my mom mode to be wrong. I don’t like mom mode and neither does Five.” She muttered.   
“Yeah, I’ll go grab him. We will be back down, he’s probably embarrassed by the teasing and we all know how he handles anxiety driven situations. Shooting people or running off.” Vanya brushed it off as she climbed the steps. It didn’t take a detective to figure out what had happened. Vanya knocked on the bathroom door, aware she was avoiding a puddle of her little brother who apparently just couldn’t make it.   
“Five…” she called out gently, she could hear him crying. It was painful to her. She dug into her purse, still slung over her shoulder, and grabbed her anxiety medication. Taking one out to give to Five, knowing Mom would do the same to calm him down.   
“What?” Five seemed aggressive through the tears, not opening the door. “Don’t make me get Luther to bust the door down. Let me in.” Vanya tried to sound light as Five aggressively tried to get his composure. He swung open the door, making direct eye contact.   
“What Vanya? What could you possibly ever fucking want?” Five always spoke with such venom when he was upset.   
“When you’re ready to talk, I’ll be in your room. Here, take this, and I’ll go get you pajamas out.” Vanya responded, handing him a pill. He blushed.   
“I don’t need drugs.”   
“You’re just going to drink, take this, I’ll ask mom to get you a script. You’ll feel better. Once again, I’ll be in your room.” She smiled, walking off for Five to slam the door shut again and to continue to cry. Vanya sighed, going to grab towels and Clorox not wanting Mom to have to do all the work. She ran into Mom at the cleaning closest.   
“Vanya, dear, what are you doing?” Her mom always sounded happy, she was about to be concerned though.   
“Getting some disinfected and towels to clean up a small mess, what about you Mom?” She grabbed them as she turned to her mother.   
“I have some things to discuss about Five. Do you know where he is?”   
“He’s in the bathroom, I gave him a Xanax can I please have some medication for his angry anxiety? He won’t ask himself.”   
“Of course I can, and probably for best with the news I am about to break to him.”   
“Break to him?”   
“Vanya, he’s had an urinary tract infection for sometime, he’s done some damage I am afraid.” She said to her with concern.   
“Not shocked. What kind of damage?”   
“I think he is probably wetting the bed twice a night, roughly every four hours because of the damage. I have prescribed a heavy course of antibiotics to be taken four times a day. I am shocked he has not began to experience day time problems as well. His bladder is in the condition he was when he was about four. I can’t believe he hasn’t expressed how badly this hurt.” Mom seemed so concerned, Vanya was much more concerned as well. “He also is very dehydrated.” She added as Vanya looked down.   
“I’m actually on my way to clean up a small Five mess in the hall. I believe he is in the shower.” Vanya sighed the kind of sigh that wasn’t all pity, but more sadness. Her brother was just so angry over all of this and she couldn’t really help. Her and mom walked towards the bathroom.   
“Let me do this dear, it won’t take long at all. Then, I’ll talk to him. Should I give you his medications? He won’t take them alone.”   
“Are you sure mom? And yeah I’ll take them.” Vanya looked at her mother, her mother that was designed for her in order to keep Vanya in line, which looking at her life now she found slightly amusing. She also felt great guilt for killing nannies though.   
“I am positive. Go to his room and wait. Thank you for taking care of Five, Vanya. I am not expecting you to care for him if it is too much.”   
“It’s not really caring mom. I’m going to go grab us a snack before coming back up. I love you.”   
“I love you too Vanya. See you soon.” Vanya handed her mother the towels and disinfected and jogged down the steps. She was met with Allison.   
“How is he?”   
“Horrible UTI.”   
“God, I am so happy I haven’t had one of those in a while.” Allison laughed as the two of them walked to the kitchen together.   
“Always pee after sex.” Vanya laughed, her and Allison may not have been super close growing up, but one thing Vanya will always remember is Allison barging in her room announcing to Vanya if she ever had sex to pee right after because she was actually peeing blood and damn did it hurt.   
“I can’t believe you remember that.” Allison snorted while laughing a true genuine laugh for a change.   
“It’s a hard image to forget. Very hard.” She laughed with her, maybe this was the bonding she missed out on as a child as she grabbed a couple apples.   
“So what are you up too?”   
“Getting Five and I a snack. I think we’re going to watch a movie or something.” Vanya said to Allison.   
“Why don’t you come down here? Make it a family affair.”   
“I think he wants to wear pajamas.”   
“Even better! I’ll go get Luther and text Diego! Family bonding!” Allison squealed and hugged Vanya before running off.   
“Fuck.” Vanya whispered before turning out of the kitchen to jog back up the steps to meet Five in his room. He was sitting with his head in his hands, just in a towel.   
“I thought you were going to grab my pajamas.” He whispered sadly, Vanya’s heart nearly broke in two. She closed the door behind her.   
“That was a quick shower…” she whispered at him walking over to him, trying to look confident, but knowing she failed for sure.   
“It was a shame shower, with mom talking to me during it. I wanted out as quick as possible.” Five whispered as she sat down next to him, he crawled to her to receive some type of comfort. She shushed him softly, rocking the two of them.   
“Nothing to be ashamed of.”   
“I pissed myself Vanya.”   
“Did Mom talk to you? You should have been doing that a while.”   
“I have been it’s the first time I got caught.” His voice cracked as she rubbed his back. He wiped his faced viciously as he looked to her.   
“Five, why didn’t you say anything.”   
“Because I am scared Vee, why is this even happening? It didn’t in the apocalypse. But here we fucking are.” Vanya held his closer, kissing his temple.   
“Because life sucks, let’s get pjs. Allison wants us all to watch a movie down stairs and Mom is bringing me your medication so you can get your first doses.” Vanya said standing up, deciding Five didn’t need to wallow in self pity.  
“I don’t want too.” He whined, as she grabbed a pair of academy pajamas for him and for herself.   
“I get it Five, but come on. They all love you and they missed you so much like I did. It’ll be fun I guess. You can share the couch with me?” Vanya offered.   
“Fine.” He sounded disgruntled, but agreed. Vanya stared at the package she purchased for her brother last night, he needed to wear one for his eventual nap. Especially since it would probably just be bedtime, not a nap. She grabbed one and handed it to him.   
“No way in hell.” Five looked like he could spit fire.   
“Yes, come on, we will probably crash on the couch in a big pile. Then we don’t have to act all weird leaving to go to bed.” She didn’t want to add one of his UTI meds was definitely a diuretic, meaning he was going to be peeing a few more times than normal.   
“Then they will know.” How he said that was, wow, anger.   
“They won’t, biggest morons in the history of forever.” Vanya said and Five nodded in agreement there.   
“We get pizza for dinner, and we get dessert.”   
“Of course, but you cannot stay dehydrated.”   
“Fine.” Five muttered as he grabbed the cream their mom had left by his bed, applying it as Vanya changed awkwardly in the closet. She waited to come out for Five’s go ahead. She could tell slightly that he wasn’t in underwear, but honestly, she could hardly tell. Once his shirt would be on you would not be able to see the top of his protection either.   
“Are those hives?” She asked looking at his arms as he went to put his shirt on.   
“I’m stressed.” He muttered.   
“My god Five, let me go grab you a Benadryl or two. You can’t just be covered in hives. Are you itchy?”   
“Vanya I am not a baby, but I would like some Benadryl yes.” He said looking down to do his buttons. She sighed heavy and walked to the bathroom to grab the medication for her brother.   
“You still fit in academy pajamas? Are those Five’s?” Diego startled her slightly.   
“Yes and yes. Don’t laugh I can snap your neck from blinking. Also what type of pajamas are you wearing?”   
“I am wearing my Christmas pajamas Patch gave me last year, shut the fuck up.”   
“Oh but you can comment on mine?” She laughed at the banter as he started to run down the steps. Vanya grabbed the medication quickly and went back to Five’s room, giving him two pills based on his size.   
“Okay, I think I am ready.” Vanya could feel the anxiety off of Five, she grabbed the blankets and the two headed down the steps, Five holding his pillow.   
“AH! I cannot believe the two recluses joined us!” Klaus laughed from the love seat he was lounging on, Five sat down on the couch which Vanya promised to share, he could swear you could hear his damn diaper, but no sibling seemed to look his way besides to address Klaus’ comment.   
“Vanya promised pizza and dessert.”   
“ahaha yes, what type of pizza are we ordering?” Klaus asked as Vanya reached for her credit card and phone.   
“Everyone better decide quick.” She sat next to Five, who leaned into her, craving the lost touch. Different orders were shout out and the movie picking began as Vanya was on the phone, he started to feel calmer, he felt just better. Maybe the medicine Vanya gave him really did help. After the order was placed and the movie picked (a comedy that would have them rolling, according to Diego), the group settled in. No one commented as Five crawled closer to Vanya, demanding silently his hair be played with. No one commented when his shirt rode up and everyone silently released what was going on. Mom got the pizza for them and delivered it on the coffee table along with sodas and slipped Five’s medication to Vanya on her way out.   
“Hey, you gotta eat something for your medicine.” Vanya rubbed his back as he whined as she sat them up.   
“I don’t wanna.” He whined, his voice laced with a sleepiness.   
“Come on.” She teased as she handed him a piece of pepperoni pizza before grabbing herself one. The movie was funny, but she watched how Five picked at his pizza, trying to regain his sister he felt lost again. Thankfully he perked up some as he ate, drinking something even.   
“Are they big pills?” Vanya looked at the antibiotics, purridium, and medication to stimulate the kidneys, none seemed huge.   
“No, they’re all little. Ready to take them?” She asked quietly as he nodded, if he took them they could lay back down. She silently praised him as she leaned back to watch the movie, it lasted peacefully about ten more minutes before Five was pulling on Vanya. She sighed and laid back to hold her brother as they watched the film.   
“You’ll wake me up for bed?”   
“No, we can all sleep down here I think.” Vanya whispered back to her brother.   
“No, wake me up so I don’t you know, in front of everyone.” Vanya understood what he meant and nodded. The entire conversation seemed to go unnoticed besides for Klaus and Ben who were pleased their brother was getting help.


End file.
